Saturday, May 23, 2015

When Not To Tell The Truth

In the Gospels, Jesus says that He is the way, the truth, and the life.  We have a commandment from God that tells us that we are not to bear false witness (i.e. lie) about our neighbor.  God delights in truth in the inward parts, and even calls us to be such an honorable people that our word is good, so that our yes actually means yes, and our no actually means no.

So we are to tell the truth.  But I put a question before you.  Is it always appropriate to share the whole truth?  For most of us, the quick answer is to say, of course.  We should always share the truth, and not tell lies.  And I agree with that.  However, I want to have us think about this a little deeper.

Let's say that you are over at some friends' house.  In the midst of your time there, the husband and wife have a sharp disagreement, which leaves one stalking out of the room in anger.  With the uncomfortable situation, you decide that it's best if you give them some space to work things out.  As you leave, you call another friend, whom you had been planning to chat with a bit later.  This person is surprised that you are calling early.  After all, weren't you at so and so's house? 

How much of what you witnessed do you share?  Sure, you could tell the whole truth, that they got into a fight and one of them left angrily, but does that do any good for anyone?  Do you want to introduce that into their reputation, as though they are angry people at each other in the eyes of others?  Or, do you say something like, my time got done there early, so I wanted to see if you were available? 

I believe that this is where Martin Luther's explanation to the eighth commandment (You shall not bear false testimony) comes in helpful.  He says that are not to betray our neighbor (as in, spill the beans on everything we know of them), slander them (as in, tell outright lies about them), or hurt their reputation.  Instead, we are to speak well of them and explain everything in the kindest way.

Sometimes that charge is more difficult to do than at other times.  Sometimes, we have to make major decisions without being able to tell others the full extent of what we know.  That can be difficult, and yet, as we seek to build up each others' reputation, can we do less in the eyes of God?

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