The last couple of days, I have been thinking about some of the challenges that come with reconciliation. Today I want to tackle one that deals with our expectations. Now, you and I tend to think in a linear fashion. When one thing happens, it should lead to something else. And to pull that thought into our topic, if I go to the other person, confess what I did, and ask for their forgiveness, we have an assumption that they should forgive us, and not just forgive us, but do it at that moment when we ask.
But what if they don't forgive you at that moment? Did the whole process fail, then? Did I make an inadequate confession if they choose not to forgive me? Well, given that I cannot see through to the heart of every situation, I can't judge that one way or the other. But I can address a thought that can enter into a situation like this. Just because you are ready to confess and to ask for forgiveness, does the other person have to be ready to forgive at that moment? None of us recover from the times when others sin against us in the same way. We simply may not have gotten over it, or maybe we haven't thought about it for a while. And if these, or other related thoughts, are the case, then is it fair to expect instant forgiveness, right there, on the spot?
Yes, it would be nice if that forgiveness came at the exact moment we were ready to confess and ask for it. In the case of God, we know it's already there, and that God has actually already forgiven us, even before we ask, because of what Jesus has done. But when we think about the earthly side of forgiveness, we have to acknowledge that the process of confession and forgiveness does not always run so smoothly.
So what do we do if they don't forgive me then and there? I would suggest that you remember this. God wants that forgiveness shared, but perhaps a bigger concern for Him is about your heart. Your heart and intent was to admit your wrong and sin, and to ask for forgiveness. Regardless of whether that forgiveness is shared back to you, you have shown sorrow over your sin. You have taken the appropriate approach, one that fits with God's design for reconciliation and forgiveness. That is truly an action that is in line with God's will and design.
In some respects, God would have us go through the process as He has designed it, regardless of the outcome. Yes, for us, it is very fulfilling to hear that word of forgiveness offered when we confess. However, our forgiveness in God's sight is not dependent upon their word of forgiveness to us. In that way, the condition of our heart matters more than the actual process being completed through to the end. Our forgiveness with God is secure. The earthly forgiveness that we desire may not be secured, but we have approached the situation as God would have us do, and that is good and right for us to do.
Do we desire their forgiveness, especially when we have taken such a bold step as to confess our sin and ask for their forgiveness? Yes. But in the end, it's the blood of Jesus which has won our forgiveness, and not their word of forgiveness. In that way, their word of forgiveness is really nothing more than a declaration of what Jesus has already accomplished for you. That is your security, even when they don't speak those words of forgiveness with you.
But what if they don't forgive you at that moment? Did the whole process fail, then? Did I make an inadequate confession if they choose not to forgive me? Well, given that I cannot see through to the heart of every situation, I can't judge that one way or the other. But I can address a thought that can enter into a situation like this. Just because you are ready to confess and to ask for forgiveness, does the other person have to be ready to forgive at that moment? None of us recover from the times when others sin against us in the same way. We simply may not have gotten over it, or maybe we haven't thought about it for a while. And if these, or other related thoughts, are the case, then is it fair to expect instant forgiveness, right there, on the spot?
Yes, it would be nice if that forgiveness came at the exact moment we were ready to confess and ask for it. In the case of God, we know it's already there, and that God has actually already forgiven us, even before we ask, because of what Jesus has done. But when we think about the earthly side of forgiveness, we have to acknowledge that the process of confession and forgiveness does not always run so smoothly.
So what do we do if they don't forgive me then and there? I would suggest that you remember this. God wants that forgiveness shared, but perhaps a bigger concern for Him is about your heart. Your heart and intent was to admit your wrong and sin, and to ask for forgiveness. Regardless of whether that forgiveness is shared back to you, you have shown sorrow over your sin. You have taken the appropriate approach, one that fits with God's design for reconciliation and forgiveness. That is truly an action that is in line with God's will and design.
In some respects, God would have us go through the process as He has designed it, regardless of the outcome. Yes, for us, it is very fulfilling to hear that word of forgiveness offered when we confess. However, our forgiveness in God's sight is not dependent upon their word of forgiveness to us. In that way, the condition of our heart matters more than the actual process being completed through to the end. Our forgiveness with God is secure. The earthly forgiveness that we desire may not be secured, but we have approached the situation as God would have us do, and that is good and right for us to do.
Do we desire their forgiveness, especially when we have taken such a bold step as to confess our sin and ask for their forgiveness? Yes. But in the end, it's the blood of Jesus which has won our forgiveness, and not their word of forgiveness. In that way, their word of forgiveness is really nothing more than a declaration of what Jesus has already accomplished for you. That is your security, even when they don't speak those words of forgiveness with you.
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