There's an old expression out there that says, "It takes two to tango." Having taken dance lessons at one time in my life, prior to my wedding, I understand the thought here. It's really hard to dance all by yourself. Having a partner there to participate with helps immensely. You only get so much out of shadow dancing by yourself.
As we've been thinking about peacemaking, reconciliation, and forgiveness lately, that brings to mind this question. Does making peace take two (or maybe sometimes more)? Does there have to be a person who confesses as well as a person who forgives? Can you only have one part of the equation present to have "effective" peacemaking?
This is actually a more relevant question than you might suppose. In our day and age of transiency, it may be rather difficult to get back in touch with that person from whom you need to ask forgiveness. Death too often intrudes before we have made our peace with the person. And so, in cases like this, this question looms large. (And no, I'm not going too deeply with the case where the one person simply doesn't want to talk to the other, even though the opportunity may be there. That's a slightly different situation.)
Does it take two to make peace? Let's start off very simply. If you want to confess what you've done, it's rather difficult to make that confession to someone who isn't there. In the same way, getting the word of forgiveness from someone who isn't there is also a rather significant challenge. Sure, it's great that your heart might be prepared to confess your wrong and ask for forgiveness, but without the other person, that assurance of forgiveness is simply lacking.
There's another part to this, which I'll take up a bit tomorrow. What if I confess, but they refuse to forgive me? Again, it's a reminder of the importance of having that one to one discussion when it comes to confession and forgiveness. There's also the question that can be asked when you find that you are ready to forgive, but you don't have that person readily available to speak that word of forgiveness to. But we'll handle those as we keep the conversation going.
As we've been thinking about peacemaking, reconciliation, and forgiveness lately, that brings to mind this question. Does making peace take two (or maybe sometimes more)? Does there have to be a person who confesses as well as a person who forgives? Can you only have one part of the equation present to have "effective" peacemaking?
This is actually a more relevant question than you might suppose. In our day and age of transiency, it may be rather difficult to get back in touch with that person from whom you need to ask forgiveness. Death too often intrudes before we have made our peace with the person. And so, in cases like this, this question looms large. (And no, I'm not going too deeply with the case where the one person simply doesn't want to talk to the other, even though the opportunity may be there. That's a slightly different situation.)
Does it take two to make peace? Let's start off very simply. If you want to confess what you've done, it's rather difficult to make that confession to someone who isn't there. In the same way, getting the word of forgiveness from someone who isn't there is also a rather significant challenge. Sure, it's great that your heart might be prepared to confess your wrong and ask for forgiveness, but without the other person, that assurance of forgiveness is simply lacking.
There's another part to this, which I'll take up a bit tomorrow. What if I confess, but they refuse to forgive me? Again, it's a reminder of the importance of having that one to one discussion when it comes to confession and forgiveness. There's also the question that can be asked when you find that you are ready to forgive, but you don't have that person readily available to speak that word of forgiveness to. But we'll handle those as we keep the conversation going.
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