Life as Community, or as Individual?

Years ago, I watched a fairly forgettable movie entitled "Bend it like Beckham".  As a young man playing soccer at the time, it held some appeal to me.  The movie wasn't quite what I was expecting, but there is a subplot that occurs during the movie that has stuck with me for some time.

In the movie, a young British girl is playing soccer, and on her team, there also comes to be a young lady whose family is from India (I believe).  The family of the girl from India is very adamant that she not play soccer, and she is willing to lay aside what she personally wants for what her family sees as good for her.  Of course, to a Western society focused on the individual over the community, this makes little sense, and so, of course, we cheer in the end when the family relents and the young lady is free to do what she wants, which is, of course, to play futbol.

In recent years, I've come to see this dynamic in a different light.  Our western focus on the individual has its strengths, no doubt, but it also comes with its great weaknesses.  A focus on community (or on family) means that a person always has a place where they are welcome (which makes the parable of the Prodigal son much more understandable in that light.).  However, a focus on the individual means that we often only welcome others as long as they "do" something for us.  If we encounter conflict, we run away to another place where others, hopefully, won't be in conflict with us.  When hard times come along, it's easier to leave when you don't have a community to be answerable to, and so we fail to grow and mature in our lives as we fail to stick it out with our community.

Sadly, this reality has greatly infiltrated God's Church.  How many people look around for a church that fits their needs, rather than asking how they can work themselves into the church?  How often do we look for what we want in the church, rather than asking what would be best for the family overall?  How often do we treat each other as family (yes, even with the quarrels and the good times)?  How often do we sacrifice what we want for what is good for the family overall?

God has created this wonderful gathering of His people called the Church, a place where God's people are renewed in the image of the sacrificing God who sacrificed for His people.  Should we be surprised that our lives, as we are renewed in Christ each day through our baptism, should actually look the same?

It's Startling

It doesn't happen very often, but every once in a while, something actually does catch me by surprise.  I say it doesn't happen very often because there is one significant part of me that always expects human beings to be the sinful beings that they are.  I'm not really surprised when an upstanding person suddenly is revealed to have a dark side to them, or a hidden lifestyle, or something along those lines.  Part of me actually expects that, since we are, by nature, sinful and unclean.  It will come out.

But over the past half a year plus, I have actually been surprised.  My wife and I celebrated the addition of a little boy to our family just days before last Christmas.  As we started to figure out what this new addition meant to our family and our life, I knew that it would call for some extra time on my part, time I was truly happy to give.  After all, one of the primary commands that God has given to men, husbands and fathers in particular, is to care for their families and to make sure that their needs were met.

Truth be told, I was surprised that there are those who found it strange that I, the husband and father and head of the household, would take the time to make sure that all was well within the household.  Undoubtedly, that required a few sacrifices on my part, but thankfully, God also has blessed me with a number of awesome people who were able to fill in gaps.  Sure, things went undone as the demands of time and commitment called me to my family, but overall, I would like to think that, in the grand scheme of things, relatively few things of significance were impacted.

As Christians abiding in the nation in which we live, have we so bought into what our nation and culture teaches that we find it odd or even distressing that a husband and father would want to spend a little extra time with his family?  Have we become more Americanized, as in thinking that the father has to spend hours on end outside the household and that the mother has to assume all the working duties of the house, than we are Christianized, where care and concern for others is our highest command?  Do we take it that, when God commands that the head of the household should care for his family, that this only means in going to work, and not in actually being present with them, especially at challenging transition times like sleep and lunch and dinner and the like?

I don't know.  I guess the reason I was so startled and surprised was that I truly would hope that a father caring for his family wouldn't be so odd, but then again, so many of the things that God would have us consider as we live as His people truly are countercultural. 

Discovering Joy!!!

One of the benefits of having a two year old daughter is how you often get to see the world through her eyes.  I love when we are playing outside, and she sees the neighbor's cat, and gets all excited to see the "kitty".  Or when she grabs my finger and has me follow her through her little trail in the bushes to "go in, daddy" with her.  Or when she hears the airplane flying overhead and looks up to see it, or the bird flying through the air, or the ant on the ground.  Well, you get the picture.

I have realized for several years that the occupation I serve in is one where you sometimes see the worst of people.  God tells us that we are sinful, and there are times where I am left to deal with the sinfulness of God's people.  While there is joy to be found even in those dealings, the prevailing thought and emotion that often comes through such situations tends more toward sadness.  It becomes easy to get frustrated with sinful human beings, or upset when they don't respond as you hoped, or even hard on yourself when you realize your own inadequacy for the situation.

Several times recently, though, it has been that joy of seeing life through the eyes of a two year old that has often opened my eyes to discovering joy.  I need to see the world through her eyes, because there is so much that God has made that is good, and praiseworthy, and worthy of celebration and devotion.  That's a reminder that I often need, and so often, God gives me that reminder in that little girl, even when it's something as simple as a little walk to the stop sign and back.

Where does God open your eyes to discovering joy?  I really do think that, if we start looking for it, we'll start to see that He is presenting more joy to us than we would ever expect to find out there.

Making a Home

From 1 Chronicles 17:10; "Moreover, I declare to you that the LORD will build you a house."

The words above were spoken to King David at a time when he wanted to build a house for the LORD.  But, as God spoke to David through Nathan, God turned the tables on David.  David would not build a house for the LORD, but the LORD would build a house for David.  Not a literal house, but a home, a family, and a line of descendants that would stretch all the way to God's own eternal Son, who would redeem the world.

That is much like God.  We have our ideas of what we would like to do, and then God does even greater things for us, and so often they are unexpected.  I have noticed this in my life quite often, but most recently as God has provided a house for my family and I.  Upon our recent move to Georgia, we rented a house for the majority of this year.  We were often out househunting, and just recently, it seems as though God has dropped a wonderful home right into our laps.  We are very thankful for that gift.

We're also reminded that God has made us a family, and that our family is truly a gift from him.  Without the long story, I can truly say that our little daughter is a gift from God in many ways, not the least of which was the timing of her conception.  God has truly made a house for us in our family.

My family and I don't have a direct promise from God, such as Nathan gave to David, about our house.  However, there is so much about our house that demonstrates God's faithfulness to us, and we simply marvel and respond with our thanks and praise to all that He has provided for us.

Now, if God could only do something to transport all those boxes and all that furniture over there from our rental!

Coming from our Roots

My wife's dad was out visiting with us for a little more than a week recently, and it was a great joy to have him with us. He graciously helped to paint our nursery and guest rooms, as well as a few other small projects around the house. But more than anything, we simply enjoyed having him out here to spend some time with us.

As the time went by, I began to notice a lot of ways that my wife is like her dad.  There were common ways of approaching decisions that they share, little phrases, their particular approaches to how well a project should be done, and a number of other things that I noticed coming out.  After witnessing some of these, I started to comment to both of them about how similar they were to each other.

This afternoon, that got me to thinking.  We can be so very similar to one or both of the parents that we come from.  But, as Christians, we also have been given a new birth, one that took place when we were baptized.  At that time, when faith first stirred up to life within us, we were made children of God the Father.  Many of us have had the good fortune to be raised in Christian households, and so we've been raised, in some respects, by our Father, through things such as our worship and our learning times.

Just how much has our Father rubbed off on us?  After all, we have the greatest "Dad" ever. He's a dad who takes all of our inherited sinfulness and badness, and put it to death in Jesus on the cross.  He's a dad who daily washes us and makes us new because of that baptism that we received.  He's a dad who is gracious, who is compassionate, who is loving and caring.  He's a dad who is just, and who looks for our good, no matter what situation we may find ourselves in.

Our dad has given us a new life in Him, through our connection to Jesus through our baptism.  It would then make sense that we, in some form or fashion, would start showing some of those similar characteristics as our Father.  Never perfectly, and far too often we will fail to act accordingly. But the absence of these could legitimately raise the question of if we really are related to this Father.

How has the Father rubbed off on you?  How do you see the influence and character of your Father in your life?