Getting to Know You

Quick introductory question: How well do you know your next door neighbors?  And once you think about that, how well do you know the people up and down your street, or on the same floor of your apartment?  If you think about those questions and realize that you don't know the people there very well, then I would throw in a follow-up question.  What is preventing you from getting to know them?

I suppose we could ask the same thing about the people that we worship with.  How well do you know the people who sit in front of you, behind you, or at the other end of the row?  How well do you know the people that sit across the aisle from you?  And, as you consider those, I'd toss in the same follow-up question.  What is preventing you from getting to know them?

I recently heard an interesting thought that came out of some research on churches and how they interact with newer people in their midst.  The common thought out there is that people want a friendly church.  But the researchers found that this statement isn't exactly accurate.  What they discovered is something that I think we all sort of know in our minds and hearts.  People don't want others to merely be friendly with them.  They want to develop friendships with the people they worship with.  They don't want merely a smile and a handshake; they want to get to know God's people as they worship.  They want friends, not merely friendliness.

The problem that many new people discover is that the people already there seem to have their fill of friends already.  It's pretty true that God's people spend time with the friends that they already have, and I absolutely do not want to discourage that.  However, I would also suggest that it is necessary to get to know those who make their way among us.  We need to reach to them with the hope that God is sending us a new friend, one with whom we can share our faith and hope, as well as our lives.  While this isn't the saving Gospel message, it is often a key factor that keeps people coming so that they can hear the Gospel message, in worship, but also from God's people.

Getting to know you.  That's what we are about as we gather together.  Yes, there are many reasons we come together as Christians, but one that we shouldn't overlook is how we get to know those who are new among us.

So, this coming Sunday, to whom will you reach out a welcoming hand and say, "I'd like to get to know you"?

Walking Together

Yesterday, I posted a little bit about what it could mean to be inclusive as Christians.  Today, I want to follow that thought up a little bit more.  Specifically, as we think about the things that we do as Christians, how do we seek to include those who may not yet know Jesus, as we hope for the Spirit to do His work of changing their hearts to faith.

I'll start off with a quick question.  What would you think if a new person, not yet a Christian, but interested and open to learning more, came into your church and had a wonderful voice?  Would you welcome that person into the church choir prior to their becoming a "member"? (At some point, I'll talk a little bit about membership and what all it means, but for the moment, we'll say that it means they are instructed in the faith and say that they believe what they have learned)  If you say no, what are your objections?  If you say yes, what is your reasoning for including them?

I'm not going to say that there is a cut and dried solution to such a question as this.  I will also say that we are called to proceed in caution when we think of ways to have people not yet Christian walking alongside us.  For example, I would suggest that it would be inappropriate for a non-Christian to teach in the Sunday School class, regardless of how skilled they are as a teacher.  There is an element of sharing what you have learned in teaching, and if they have not yet learned and know Jesus, how can they share about Him?

At the same time, I would also suggest that we should look for more ways to include those not yet in Jesus in walking together with us.  Could they sing in the choir?  Perhaps there the Spirit will work through the words and the music to draw them to faith.  On the other hand, if they only see it as an opportunity to show off their voice, then perhaps it isn't fully appropriate.  How do you discern between these?  Well, as with most things, it gets back to connecting with the person, growing in a relationship with them.

Ultimately, the reason that we include people in our walk together is because we want them to know the hope of Jesus in their lives.  That means that we need to do the necessary work of getting to know them, of relating to them, of loving them as the neighbor that God puts among us.  Only as we get to know them can we understand which roles are appropriate for them to participate in as they walk along with us.  Sure, we may make mistakes about that from time to time, but that is where we rest even more on the forgiveness of God in Jesus.

What it Means to be Inclusive

When we think about God's message of grace and forgiveness through Jesus, we see that God intends for this gift to be inclusive.  God wants all people to have access to their forgiveness in Jesus and to eternal life.  God wants all people to be included in offering their prayers and praise, as they receive His grace and goodness.  God is inclusive in this sense.  He wants all people to be part of His eternal, enduring kingdom.

Yet, we find that which may, in some ways, seem contradictory.  God tells us that those who make up His kingdom are indeed an exclusive group.  They are those who believe in what Jesus has accomplished for them, and who make that the center and anchor of what they believe and how they live.  God is exclusive in that, not all roads lead to God.  Only the road that goes through the cross and resurrection of Jesus leads to God.

That impacts how we go about our lives together as God's people.  In a way, we strive to be like God in this.  We want all people to hear the message.  We want to be an inclusive group, reaching out with that message to let all people groups know that God has redeemed them and made them His own.  And sometimes, that means that we also bring them alongside with us to learn about this one named Jesus, and what He has done, and how that impacts our lives lived together in faith.

That's what it means to be inclusive.  It means that we tell all people that this message is for them, and we walk along with them as they explore this message, as they ask questions about this message, and as they work with what that means for how they live their lives.  Sometimes it means that we ask them to work alongside us, learning how our God would have us live as forgiven people with an enduring message for the people of the world, sharing God's compassion with others. 

In one sense, that means that we should probably look more at ways, as Christians and as congregations, in which we can include people rather than exclude them.  Yes, there are elements of our faith in which God calls for some level of exclusivity, and we honor those, even as we explain them to those who do not yet know of them, seeking to bring them to a point where they are welcomed with us in those.  Yet, when it comes to such matters as feeding the poor, working on compassionate ministries, and the like, including them to work with us will likely provide more avenues for God's Spirit to work in their hearts than if we were to exclude them.

As I would explain it, inclusive means that we invite them to walk along with us as we all learn more about this God who has seen fit to forgive us in Jesus, and who wants all people to know of this forgiveness for them.

Crossing the Line

When it comes to teaching and learning, whether matters of faith or other aveunues of learning, typically it happens in this way.  An older person teaches those who are younger.  The learning, knowledge, and hopefully wisdom of years and experience are utilized to guide those who are younger, who have not had the experiences, in the hope that they learn from what others have endured.  It's the picture of learning that has been in existence pretty much since the creation of this world.

We learn from those who are older than us, by and large.  Sure, there are exceptions where the younger has something to teach the older, but in the general scheme of the world, knowledge is passed from the older generation to the younger generation.  So it really shouldn't surprise us to learn that the same dynamic would be found when it comes to matters of the Christian faith.

Likely, you already know that God calls parents to teach the matters of the faith to their children.  A quick perusal of Deuteronomy 4 and 6 will highlight the importance of doing this.  And then, as we gather as God's people, there are also additional dynamics that can also aid in the faith formation of younger people.  The more that older, more mature (we hope!!!) Christians can interact with younger Christians, the more likely it is that faith and its related matters are passed down well.

In other words, as Christians, both young and old, we are called to cross the line.  Cross the generational lines to learn what those who are older than us have experienced and learned along the way.  The older are to cross the line (even when they aren't sure how they will be received) to show an interest in those who are younger, and as that relationship builds, they also have the opportunity to share their wisdom and experience as it relates to matters of the Christian faith.  In that respect, everyone then becomes a winner.

Here's the rub.  This usually doesn't just happen.  It requires intentional work to cross the lines.  Given our nature, we tend to stick with what we know and what is comfortable.  To cross the lines means we enter a world which is unfamiliar to us.  That requires patience as we learn the inner workings of this new world, and as we learn the people who inhabit that world.  It sometimes requires that we be quiet and learn, so that the things that we don't understand may become more clear, and then, suddenly, we have an opportunity to relate our faith to the life of the person across that line.

Crossing the line is not easy, but then again, the best things in life are rarely easy.  So with whom will you "cross the line" in the near future?  Who knows, you just may have your faith life changed for the better by doing it!

Complex Thoughts

Okay, there is a lot swimming around in my head today.  As usual, life and events bring many things to mind, and our Christian faith has connections to all of them.  I know that God does that because all of our life is to be the crucible in which we live out our faith, but we humans have a tendency to want to compartmentalize it, to keep God in certain parts, but not in other parts.  Or, we want what God says to apply to certain parts of our lives, but not to others.  So, with that being said, I'm simply going to ruminate for a few moments.

First thought: God has fully invested in us.  We have the full forgiveness of God in Jesus, who paid the ultimate price for us.  We have God going "all in" with us, as He ties His message and His reputation to His people.  With that level of investment in us, it really is sad that we so often fail to invest ourselves much in the matters of God in our lives.  While being "more invested" in how our faith doesn't change how God sees us as His child, it definetly impacts how others see God, see the Church, and see us as Christians.  In that regard, we do indeed reap what we sow.

Second thought: We hear people say things like, "Just trust that God will take care of things" or "Let go, let God."  I think these sayings are both right on and, at the same time, widely misused.  The reality is that God is always going to take care of things.  Our trouble is that we have a hard time believing that God is doing His thing when it goes differently than we expect.  We have an outcome in mind, while God's is likely to be far different than what we expect.  God's prefered end may not even be pleasant or enjoyable.  That's why we have a tough time with this.  But, on the other hand, sometimes we hear those phrases, and our tendency can be to use them as excuses not to take action.  If God is going to do something, then why should I?  And then, we fail to do what God may be putting before us to do.

Okay, I have many more, but that's probably more than enough to put out there for today. 

When Not To Tell The Truth

In the Gospels, Jesus says that He is the way, the truth, and the life.  We have a commandment from God that tells us that we are not to bear false witness (i.e. lie) about our neighbor.  God delights in truth in the inward parts, and even calls us to be such an honorable people that our word is good, so that our yes actually means yes, and our no actually means no.

So we are to tell the truth.  But I put a question before you.  Is it always appropriate to share the whole truth?  For most of us, the quick answer is to say, of course.  We should always share the truth, and not tell lies.  And I agree with that.  However, I want to have us think about this a little deeper.

Let's say that you are over at some friends' house.  In the midst of your time there, the husband and wife have a sharp disagreement, which leaves one stalking out of the room in anger.  With the uncomfortable situation, you decide that it's best if you give them some space to work things out.  As you leave, you call another friend, whom you had been planning to chat with a bit later.  This person is surprised that you are calling early.  After all, weren't you at so and so's house? 

How much of what you witnessed do you share?  Sure, you could tell the whole truth, that they got into a fight and one of them left angrily, but does that do any good for anyone?  Do you want to introduce that into their reputation, as though they are angry people at each other in the eyes of others?  Or, do you say something like, my time got done there early, so I wanted to see if you were available? 

I believe that this is where Martin Luther's explanation to the eighth commandment (You shall not bear false testimony) comes in helpful.  He says that are not to betray our neighbor (as in, spill the beans on everything we know of them), slander them (as in, tell outright lies about them), or hurt their reputation.  Instead, we are to speak well of them and explain everything in the kindest way.

Sometimes that charge is more difficult to do than at other times.  Sometimes, we have to make major decisions without being able to tell others the full extent of what we know.  That can be difficult, and yet, as we seek to build up each others' reputation, can we do less in the eyes of God?

Taking Care of the Present, or the Future?

A common thought present in many Christian congregations is that we need to "raise up the next generation".  In many congregations, you will hear of the need to reach the "younger generation".  Ministers and pastors are often called to help reach "young families", and given that task.  And yes, these are good and noble intentions.  We want to reach out with the saving message of forgiveness and renewal in Jesus to the next generation, to families with children and the like.

At the same time, this mindset or approach can carry some unintended consequences.  Imagine that you are a senior adult at a congregation who wants to reach "young families."  Where does that put you?  Are you not worth ministering to?  And at the same time, we also have to ask the question, are there older people in our communities who need that saving message of forgiveness and renewal in Jesus delivered to them as well?

Do we take care of the present, or of the future?  Actually, I would venture a different question.  Why can't we do both?  Why can't we show that God's grace is present for current believing and unbelieving seniors, and is also there for the younger people who both believe and do not yet believe?  Sure, the approach to such varied groups may be far different, but I would suggest that, to do one at the expense of the other is actually a harmful thing.

Think about the wisdom that a more mature Christian can pass along to someone of the younger generation.  Or, think of the smile that a young Christian can bring to even the most hardened of seniors, even if they simply tell that senior that Jesus loves them as they give them a hug.  Sometimes we need the seniors to pass along wisdom and teach maturity to the younger generation, and at times we need the younger generation to remind the seniors that Jesus spoke of receiving the kingdom of God as a child, with a child-like faith. 

Sure, nurturing those within a congregation who fit this whole span can be a balancing act at times, and working to reach out to those who do not yet know Jesus can be even more challenging.  Yet, isn't that a challenge worth taking up?  The kingdom of heaven will not be populated only by senior adults, or only by young people.  It will be made up of all people who express their faith in what Jesus accomplished for them.  A common message, even as it is one that is expressed and conveyed in a variety of ways to a variety of people.